The Colon

Dec 16, 20181 min read

The Colon's Person of the Year: Double Fudge Brownies

Dec 15, 20182 min read

Santa Casts off Christian Façade, Founds Own Religion

Dec 14, 20182 min read

U.N. Denounces North Pole’s Gruesome ‘Reindeer Games’

Dec 13, 20183 min read

Restroom Signs Getting Pretty Graphic

Dec 12, 20182 min read

Playing Hard-to-Get

Dec 11, 20182 min read

Brexit to Add More Syllables to "Worcestershire"

Dec 10, 20183 min read

Lawyer's Favorite Part of Job Reminding Witnesses They Under Oath

Dec 8, 20182 min read

Santa Cancels "Elf on the Shelf" Program After Participant Murders Host Family

Dec 8, 20183 min read

How to Break to Children that Santa is Not Real

Dec 7, 20182 min read

Report: Nine People Touched Your Soft Drink Lid Before You

Dec 6, 20182 min read

Study: 33% of Americans Base Entire Identity on Whether Trump in Office

Dec 5, 20182 min read

Toddler Biding Time to Knock over Christmas Tree Until it All Decorated

Dec 4, 20181 min read

Disease Affecting Blonde Actress Crops Devastates Christmas Movie Industry

Dec 3, 20182 min read

Grandma Says White and ‘Colored’ Christmas Lights Shouldn’t Mix

Dec 2, 20181 min read

Christmas Music Claims Another Victim

Dec 1, 20183 min read

Choosing Something to Get Outraged Over

Nov 30, 20181 min read

Seeking Trophy Wife for 2-5 Year Contract

Nov 29, 20182 min read

Jeweler Stops Beating Around Bush, Questions Your Love

Nov 28, 20181 min read

Fewer Smokers Die of Cancer than by Other Means

Nov 27, 20182 min read

PETA Purchases Meat Factories, Increases Production

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