#Seasonal

Apr 27, 20192 min read

More Children Diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes Following Easter Weekend, Causes Unknown

Feb 13, 20192 min read

Valentine’s Day Put on Hold Due to Worldwide Shortage of Cupid-sized Diapers

Jan 14, 20192 min read

Valentine’s Day Merchandise Already in Stores to Prolong Suffering of Singles

Jan 1, 20191 min read

2019 Already Considered a Loss

Dec 26, 20182 min read

Baby Jesus Enters the Off-season

Dec 25, 20181 min read

Nation's Scrooges: "Humbug"

Dec 19, 20182 min read

Agnostic's Yearly Letter Still Somehow Preachy

Dec 18, 20182 min read

Breaking: U.N. to Enter Negotiations Following Santa's Capture by North Korea

Dec 16, 20181 min read

The Colon's Person of the Year: Double Fudge Brownies

Dec 8, 20183 min read

How to Break to Children that Santa is Not Real

Dec 4, 20181 min read

Disease Affecting Blonde Actress Crops Devastates Christmas Movie Industry

Dec 3, 20182 min read

Grandma Says White and ‘Colored’ Christmas Lights Shouldn’t Mix

Dec 2, 20181 min read

Christmas Music Claims Another Victim

Nov 19, 20182 min read

Staggering Number of Turkeys Reported Dead This Fall, Reasons Unknown

Nov 18, 20181 min read

Zero-effort Pumpkin Pie

Nov 4, 20181 min read

Top 5 Hacks for Re-purposing Your Pumpkin

Oct 27, 20182 min read

Make Your Own Halloween Costume!

Oct 20, 20181 min read

Halloween Ham & Razor Sandwich

Oct 13, 20182 min read

Skull Bowl

Oct 6, 20182 min read

THE COLON

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