LANSING, MI—A new scandal has been circulating social media recently implicating the spokeschild for the Toddler Advocacy Group (TAG) in a serious bribery case.
Sara Mars, 3, has held the much-coveted leadership position in the group since the previous leader's fiasco back in August. Although she ran a campaign promising transparency and virtue, her reputation has been tainted by serious accusations that her integrity was compromised for a sticker of a rainbow.
Specifics about the accusation are still surfacing, but what is known so far is that Mars, who has been a fierce opponent of broccoli at mealtimes since taking office, actually waffled at a joint dinner meeting with the Grandparents Association of the U.S. (GAUS). Mars is accused of personally consuming as many as three bites of broccoli with the understanding that she would then receive the rainbow sticker.
Although Mars explicitly denies having ever consumed broccoli, or vegetables of any kind, multiple witnesses have come forward with reports that Mars was wearing a "shiny rainbow sticker with glittery clouds" on her dress as she attended an event at a local park the morning after the dinner in question. Additionally, others close to her cite that she has grown a full inch in the last few months, which may suggest proper nutrition.
The public outcry against Mars has been devastating. "I think broccoli is yuck," commented Patricia James, 3, who had been a supporter of Mars before the accusations surfaced. "I like stickers, but ew!"
Four-year-old James Hartsock said, "I don't know anyone who likes to eat greens, except maybe my mom, so you know they're not very good. Who wants a dumb old rainbow sticker, anyway?"
As for Mars, her office has declined to comment specifically, and she has had very few public appearances since last Monday when the accusations first surfaced. Amid calls for her to step down from her position of leadership, it is very likely that she will resign in the next few days unless she is able to find a shiny object or simple jingle to distract the other members of the Toddler Advocacy Group leadership.