STOCKTON, CA—Many Americans are all too familiar with the annual cycle of packing on pounds during the holiday months. However, recent studies from University of the Pacific have revealed that the population most affected by the phenomenon is comprised mainly of dietitians and nutritionists. Health officials from the CDC and FDA have long warned that this group of individuals is at high risk of extreme weight gain, particularly during the winter months but extending even from October to April with candy-based holidays. However, there are many factors to be considered.
One questionnaire-based study discovered that many dietitians and nutritionists avoid copious amounts of turkey, pies, and other greasy or fatty foods during the year. This habitual circumvention outside of the holidays renders their bodies unable to cope with processing and digesting such foods. Without a natural resistance, they are often unable to defend against the foods of the holidays; in other words, their bodies do not know how to react and they are, thus, unable to help themselves. A related cause during Christmas occurs when their children put out regular cookies and milk for “Santa,” rather than low-carbohydrate breakfast cookies and light almond milk; these parents would hate for the food to go to waste and are often already on a downward spiral of justification and voracious gluttony.
Some studies focused on the consequences or aftermath following the holidays, particularly as related to vocational and everyday pursuits. Many newly obese dietitians and nutritionists struggle emotionally and psychologically, feeling like hypocrites at work. Many tend to lose all credibility with their clients or patients. Furthermore, it is difficult to gain new friends or clients when one’s job description sounds like a joke given one’s girth. Similarly, one’s home life is often affected as spouses, children, and even pets will not look at them the same. Several questionnaire participants reported that just talking about delicious foods took its toll, thoughts of sweet and/or savory foods consuming every waking moment. Even most dreams—some graphic and bizarre—circle back to a feast of a snack and end in a rapacious fit of gormandizing all food in the household as a midnight snack. Some participants complained of having to use voice recognition software for their cell phones, their fingers too thick and greasy, typically with Cheetos residue or a type of vegetable oil. Their sweat has essentially become melted, salted butter, garlic, or honey depending on whether the individual recently consumed savory or sweet foods.
Despite previous research, the recent studies have revealed more concerning issues. Concomitant food addiction has proven far worse than tobacco, opioids, and meth. There are sundry complaints of aches all over nutritionists’ and dietitians’ bodies, lightheadedness, and other symptoms of withdrawal. The obesity’s additional strain on the body’s organs contributes to their risk for cardiovascular and other diseases. Some have tried to wean themselves off of fatty foods with Little Debbie snacks but were disappointed to discover that the snacks are not as little nor calorie-free as they sounded; they ended up eating entire boxes of Zebra Cakes, Swiss Cake Rolls, and other individually wrapped goods. Additionally, motivation at work or for life generally frequently wanes; many nutritionists and dietitians will show up to work donning sweats, baggy t-shirts, or other loose-fitting clothing.
Dr. James Denali, who was both a participant in one study as well as a head researcher in another, offered to hold a press conference but stopped halfway through the conference after saying, “If you’ll kindly look at this pie chart—pie, why did it have to be pie?!”