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Writer's pictureTodd Blankenship

UK Changes Currency to "Kilogram" to Conform to Metric System



LONDON, UNITED KINGDOM—Despite the impending Brexit, which will further isolate the United Kingdom from its European neighbors, the United Kingdom is moving forward with plans to comply fully with the metric system, officially known as the International System of Units (SI). By next month, the British Pound will be replaced as the nation’s currency with the British Kilogram, which is equivalent to 2.2 British Pounds. Prime Minister Theresa May had much to say on the matter.

“The economic arguments are clear,” May began. “I think, as I was saying to you a little earlier, that one of the issues is that a lot of people will invest here in the UK because the UK is, at last, part of the great International System of Units. We will be in full compliance and all international standards accounted for. So I think there are definite benefits for us in economic terms.” May continued by voicing her support for the UK remaining in the EU and her desire that the rest of Europe would soon adopt the standardized currency if they have not done so.

While the forthcoming Brexit has caused concern for lawmakers, businesses, and citizens across the continent, many hold out hope that adoption of the currency will spark a consensus among nations so that the European Union may be reestablished with the UK as a permanent, foundational member. Such proponents argue that the standardized, decimalized currency will bring the nations closer together and will improve the individual and joint economies. However, May remarked that “no deal is better than a bad deal. We have to be prepared to walk out of negotiations if other European politicians or diplomats cannot come to the table and support the Kilogram.”

Brexit continues to unfold as the continent enters a transitional period during which trade terms, budget commitments, and immigration will remain unaltered. Meanwhile, non-Anglo Europe and the rest of the world wait with bated breath to witness the combined impact of Brexit and the new currency on the prices of British candy, tea, Union Jack Souvenirs, and British accents.

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