WASHINGTON, DC—The annual convention of The Reformed Anti Vaccination Society of America (RAVSA) ended early last week due to the hospitalizations or deaths of over 200 participants and their children stemming from the measles and other preventable causes. Thousands of anti-vaccinationists—also known as anti-vaxxers—had gathered together from around North America and Europe to discuss their take on modern medicine and proper parenting. Panels, talks, and celebrity appearances were scheduled for what was originally to be a weeklong event, but it was cut short by the sudden onset of mild-to-moderate fevers, persistent coughs, inflamed eyes, and other symptoms.
“Obviously, we did not intend for this to happen at all,” observed Mark Waxill, president of RAVSA and chief organizer of the event. “I mean, all that we wanted to do was create an open forum for only one side of the argument, a place where the virtues of discredited theories and fear-based opinions can be shared and valued above the lower-quality, alleged proofs of highly researched empirical evidence. How else can we purge this autism menace—sorry, this menace with autism—from society?”
President Waxill and other anti-vaxxers adhere to the belief that the MMR vaccine—which is given to prevent measles, mumps, and rubella (German measles)—and other vaccines cause autism. The idea stems from a 1998 paper published by Andrew Wakefield and others in which the authors suggested that autism spectrum disorders may present soon after the administration of the vaccine. Subsequent peer-reviewed studies contradicting the paper as well as the revelation of a conflict of interest and lack of scientific integrity in the original study have served only to fuel the fervor or zeal of Waxill’s movement. To date, this occurrence marks the single worst outbreak of the disease in a developed country in recent history. Notwithstanding such a setback, Waxill remains optimistic for the future of the organization and next year’s event.
“Admittedly, this year has been a little bit of a disaster. There have been some talks of doing a digital conference or maybe requiring those who attend next year’s anti-vaxxer convention get their vaccines before attending. If they put up a fight, we’ll just show them some of the recent literature on the matter. Should be easy-peasy.”