Hello, honeys! It's your lucky day, because after popular demand and my latest divorce, I am back on the market!
You heard it right: my fifth wife just couldn't handle all of this awesomeness, so she threw in the towel a couple of days ago. I know what you're thinking—"Woah, man. That's a lot of divorces. What's wrong with all of these ladies that keep taking off on you, bro?" That's a great question, cuz. Those chicks were nuts. They were always like, "Where have you been since Thursday?" and "How are we going to pay for that?" and "Have you stopped taking your pills again?" I don't need all that. I'm busy trying to keep it real.
So anyway, I got a lot of love left to give, and I'm always on the prowl for the next Mrs. Right. Don't let those first 5 wives of mine get in your head. I guess it just wasn't meant to be each time. I'm sure it'll be different this time around, though. I got a good feeling about this next one. It's basically the same feeling I had before each of my other marriages, but this time it's right now instead of back then.
If you feel like your lucky number is 6, then give me a holler, and I'll come a runnin'.
Comments