Even Though I Have No Experience With This Issue, I Have a Strong Opinion About It

By Theodore Michel—My fellow Americans, we are all concerned these days about the environment, and how we can best keep the planet from catastrophe. I, too, worry that one day our seas will boil, our trees will melt, and our ice will turn to carbon dioxide, or whatever the problem is.

As a concerned adult, I feel that I have no choice but to speak up on this issue. I may not have a degree in physics or geology, and sure, maybe I don't quite grasp what exactly is going on with fossil fuels and...that other kind of energy, but I assure you, I have a very strong opinion about these matters, so my voice deserves to be heard.

The other day, somebody in the news said something about nuclear energy. I very strongly dislike the word "nuclear," because it makes me think of bombs and that radiation and stuff. I feel compelled, then, to call for an outright ban on any forms of nuclears, now and forever. It's time that congress act, however they do their thing, to make sure that we are never faced by nuclears again. It's like, really bad, you guys. You don't even know,

Of course, I understand that there are a lot of people out there who will deny the science that I assume also agrees that nuclears are the worst. To those people, I say, "Do what I didn't do, and study the topic. You can't afford to be ignorant on this: the planet is at stake." Come on, guys. I can't do this alone anymore.

It's time that all of my fellow citizens who are also concerned about the planet make up their minds like I did. I encourage everyone who reads this piece to get a vague sense of this complex topic, come up with a few talking points, and then charge directly into the fray over this issue. Don't be afraid to speak up, even though you may not really have any idea about basic science, hypothesis testing, or current events generally. The time for debate, or even broadly engaging in dialogue has past, probably. So demand action now, or at the next election, or whenever the decision time comes to solve this stuff. We can do it, as long as we're unified in our outrage.